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For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Computer forensics discussion. Please ensure that your post is not better suited to one of the forums below (if it is, please post it there instead!)
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Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:54 am

I often say I'm like Abby out of NCIS only without the Fingerprints, Balistics, DNA, Blood, Fibre & Footprint Analysis! Not to mention that I lack her Zoology, Geology, Geography, Metallurgy and general Chemistry knowledge....hang on, why doesn't she just do the Autopsies as well??
_________________
_________________________________________
The only people who find what they are looking for
in life are the fault finders. 

kiashi
Senior Member
 
 
  

Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:32 am

- hmorgan
- Rich2005
Mr Morgan, I have been informed the CPS barrister is not equipped to deal with interpretative dance. He has requested that you provide printed A4 copies of the dance.


really? the full dance is 30 minutes long (that how long the drugs take to kick in)
At 25fps that's about 45000 pages.


Yes, apparently those 45000 pages will be much clearer than showing a video of the dance itself, and he steadfastly refutes any suggestion that it's because he's paid by the page.  

Rich2005
Senior Member
 
 
  

Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:42 am

- kiashi
I often say I'm like Abby out of NCIS only without the Fingerprints, Balistics, DNA, Blood, Fibre & Footprint Analysis! Not to mention that I lack her Zoology, Geology, Geography, Metallurgy and general Chemistry knowledge....hang on, why doesn't she just do the Autopsies as well??


I'm like the IT version of Dexter.  

hmorgan
Senior Member
 
 
  

Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 5:44 am

- Rich2005
- hmorgan
- Rich2005
Mr Morgan, I have been informed the CPS barrister is not equipped to deal with interpretative dance. He has requested that you provide printed A4 copies of the dance.


really? the full dance is 30 minutes long (that how long the drugs take to kick in)
At 25fps that's about 45000 pages.


Yes, apparently those 45000 pages will be much clearer than showing a video of the dance itself, and he steadfastly refutes any suggestion that it's because he's paid by the page.


Such cynicism!  

hmorgan
Senior Member
 
 
  

Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 7:38 am

It's just like this: Zoom & Enhance  

joethomas
Senior Member
 
 
  

Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 8:54 am

Well, thanks to all of my highly skilled training, and access to all the information around the world, I can pinpoint an IP address on the other side of the state within about 2.3 seconds by merely tapping a few random keys on my keyboard! Not to mention that should I need to find out who your third cousin's dog's veterinarian is.. .well that will take me about 3.5 seconds. Only then can I give you the veterinarian's room mate in college from 19 years ago and a picture of the room mate's tattoo on his left butt cheek.

But on a slow day, I spend my time taking 5 minutes to log what I do in 30 seconds. Repeat last sentence.  

couchie
Member
 
 
  

Re: For fun - What is it like being a DF investigator?

Post Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2012 10:20 am

Thanks everyone for all those great responses!

For the purposes of the "competition" I'm going to go with Infern0's entry as the winner, with the prize being inclusion in this video. Enjoy Very Happy

Jamie
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Jamie Morris
Forensic Focus
Web: www.forensicfocus.com
Blog: www.forensicfocus.com/blog
Twitter: twitter.com/ForensicFocus
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jamiemorris 

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